Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Fat people, a civil rights issue?

I hope the ride to hell is on a rollercoaster, because I might just be on it. I thanked some woman today on the way to work, and it went something like this "THANKS FOR TAKING UP THE ENTIRE F*CKING INTERSECTION YOU INCONSIDERATE BITCH!". Apparently, she, and her child in the back seat, heard me, because she proceeded to lay on the horn while flailing her arm at me, which I couldn't see too well through her tinted windows. I hope the scene plays out later of her child saying things like "Mommy, what's a f*cking intersection?" and "Why'd he call you an inconsiderate bitch?".

But I digress. The topic here is obese people. Apparently, a lot of these obese people are trying to advance civil rights for themselves, claiming that they are being paid less, treated poorly and overall shunned by society. Okay. I can see being a little indignant because you're a few pounds overweight. BUT, And it's a BIG but here (pun intended), YOU BROUGHT THE PROBLEM ON YOURSELVES. I don't care what quack you see that says "it's a glandular problem", or what not. If you didn't eat like crap, eat too much of that crap, and got up and walked a mile or two twice a day, you wouldn't be this quivering mound of gross. If you can't fit in a f*cking airline seat, YOU'RE TOO GODDAMNED BIG. I'll make exceptions for those who are extremely tall for the airline argument, but overall, if getting the mail from your mailbox causes you to breathe heavy, you deserve NO sympathy from the non-fat. I've been to England, France, Amsterdam, and you know how many obese people I saw there? NONE. Not a one. Okay, maybe a couple. I saw thousands of the best looking people I've ever seen. Out of a thousand, I'd say one was fat. So, is the food not as fatty? Does their pasta not contain carbs? No, it's the same stuff. But they don't eat as much. They walk around. And they dont' supersize it.

I think an airline has every right to charge you for the extra seat if you don't fit in the f*cking seat. These fat people also claim that employers don't pay them as much. You want to know why? BECAUSE YOUR BODY TYPE SAYS LAZY. People don't look at skinny people and say, "You know, he looks like he doesn't work hard enough because he can't afford enough food!", they look at fat people and say "Boy, if he'd put down that doughnut and do some WORK, he might not be so fat!" Yes, we discriminate. Why? Because people who are obese a) often smell funny, b) are NOT fun to look at c) make the most disgusting noises when they breathe d) they're always breathing heavy as if that walk 38 feet was the hardest thing EVER, e) compain all the goddamn time about "How hard it is to lose weight" while they're ordering 10 cheeseburgers and a diet coke.

Bottom line? Get a bicycle. Walk 2 miles a day. PORTION CONTROL. Drink water, lots of it. And for the love of God, STOP BLAMING SOCIETY FOR YOUR FAT. If society is to blame, then ALL of us would be fat, not just the 1/3 (what a disgusting number, btw) that are. You have image issues because of YOUR perceptions, not ours. Civil Rights. Maybe I should start getting my skinny friends together to bitch about how fat people are ruining MY civil liberties, as in, I shouldn't have to endure YOUR stinky, disgusting self in public. I am free to express my opinion, and frankly, you obese types are disgusting, and you only have yourselves to blame.

8 comments:

Nick said...

I agree 100% with everything you are saying here. I was about to post on the exact same issue and wanted to see if I was the only one that felt this way.

I know from personal experience that eating too much good food makes you gain weight. I got injured playing football in college and pretty much didn't do any physical activity for 6 months while maintaining the same diet I had before. I gained a bunch of weight and looked like shit. So, I made the decision to change myself. I ate "healthy" and worked out 6 times a week doing heavy weights and cardio and was in great shape in less than 6 months. At that point, I went back to the diet of good (delicious) food and never gained any weight unless I wanted to. You know why? Because I spend 2 hours in the gym every day pushing myself as hard as I can. Fuck people who don't do that and complain. They don't have any right to complain because they're not trying as hard as they can.

Symo said...

Thanks Nick, hopefully your example will motivate others... hopefully. I'm waiting for the comments that will reveal me as the unsympathetic jerk that I am. Well, I have no sympathy for those who will not do for themselves. Sue me, sue McDonalds, sue everybody, but whatever you do, you fat bastards, don't get on an exercise bike.

Years ago, my primary care physician said to me "Go ahead and keep smoking... it keeps me in business". So, you fat bastards out there who aren't happy with reality, the reality is this: McDonalds loves you, the local university hospital is happy you're fat, because they can't do bypass operations without your cholesterol laden arteries, and undertakers are happier when you check out early. So, don't be so depressed. You're making a lot of people rich and happy.

Eva G. said...

Uh oh. I think I'm in love with you. Not in a stalker, creepy sort of way. Just in a platonic, friendly, "you're a cool dude in a loose mood" kind of way. :)

I have dealt with a lot of folks with the mindset that losing weight is too hard. I understand it's tough - I quit smoking and gained 30 pounds, but I realized and adjusted (and am slowly losing the weight). As I age, I have found that not being fat takes commitment.

And I'm seriously going to puke the next time I see a fatty order a shit ton of food and demand that their cola be diet. Wtf?

Keep up the good work... and... GO WINGS!

Symo said...

Thanks Eva! I'm okay with your love, because all love is good love. Even stalker love is good, unless you're like Paula Abdul's stalker... I don't like corpses in the yard. Makes it hard to mow, and the grass grows greener in that spot for YEARS. Then you get the questions, "How did you get that body shaped patch of grass?". It can be a hassle.

Seriously though, thanks for reading. I'm a bit of a fan of yours already too, because smart is sexy... and sexy is good! In the meantime, Go Wings!

Anonymous said...

Hey not fair! I was in love with you first! Don't hate me because I am fat...

Alison said...

I hate to admit I'm with you on this one...some pounds and a heavy build is one thing....really big is lifestyle, depression, portions, whatever...but my insurance premiums are huge to cover lots of diabetes and heart disease for the fat.
Stop smoking though Symo! My insurance premiums pay for that shit too.

Symo said...

I've been smoke free (relatively speaking of course) for 5 months now. See, we smokers are being taxed like hell for this sh*t, so you shouldn't be paying anything, but I digress....

Edward said...

That little rant just shows how clueless you are.

I'm fat. And I don't order diet coke, I like my coke regular, and with no ice.

I recently asked a few of my "skinny" friends to help me with some yard work. So they all stood there looking funny on more than one occasion while my blood boiled and I did most of the work.

What does offend me is when people say "go exercise" or "stop being lazy" or "I'll introduce you to a friend who lost a bunch of weight" or any of the similar stupid, ignorant comments. The one thing I will agree with is that it's a choice. And I choose to be who I am, so let me be. I'm sure I'm not alone.